Do you ever find yourself feeling hopeless and ill-tempered? Do you engage in reckless behavior? Do you have trouble sleeping? Have your eating habits changed? Do you have difficulty seeing the bright side of life?
If so, don't worry - there has been a monumental breakthrough in the fight against depression, and it can be found right here in central Iowa. This amazing cure can be yours for only $50.
This treatment has spent nearly thirteen years in clinical trials, and is easily recognized by its attractive orange and white coating. Accept no substitutes!
Side effects may include giddy laughter*, irrepressible smiling** and a warm feeling in your heart***. May also be somewhat bittersweet, since this wonder drug may only be available for another year or two.
(* - caused by the sight of her running around like a drunken sailor)
(** - caused by her nonstop wagging tail and huge pitty-grin)
(*** - caused by knowing you're giving a wonderful senior dog a real home to live out the rest of her days)
Supplies are limited, so act now!